I believe that there is no inherent meaning of the universe. I think that meaning is something that we create. I believe that every person has the right to respect and fair treatment. My position of privilege as white, middle class, American, Global Northerner, affects the meaning that I create, as well as the life goals I set for myself. I believe in working towards ending the exploitation of humans by those in power based on human rights principles.
I honestly do not know if I am better off for having thought critically about what I believe in. Socrates once said, "The unexamined life is not worth living," in other words living a meaningful existence means consciously examining where one draws meaning from. Right now, I am suffering for having examined my life and beliefs. I wish I could crawl back into the safety and comfort of ignorance; I wish I could lie and say that I am better for having examined my worldview, but I made a promise to be honest with myself and with this blog. The truth is that right now I am constantly exhausted, depressed, and having genuine difficulty finding a reason to get out of bed.
I believe that someday I will reap the benefits of having examined my life and will be able to create a meaningful existence. I know I can create meaning, and I know I can get through this existential funk and find my passion for life again; I just need time to process and create meaning in the small ways that I can appreciate. I still strongly believe in human rights, and I will continue to work against the gross exploitation of others in my career and daily life. My belief in helping others is often the only thing that motivates me to get up and work towards my education; I suspect this will be the meaning I fill the void with. The thought that gives me the most hope for continuing on in life is knowing that I am not alone. There are billions of other humans who have created meaningful lives in the face of a void universe and have found true happiness. If billions of humans can stare into the void and defiantly create their own lives and meaning, then I can do the same. |